Late Saturday evening in downtown Orlando, the folks who frequent the Whole Foods on Sand Lake Blvd were in for a the shock of a lifetime. There was a bumpkin sighting. At approximately 8pm, a young female country bumpkin who had never seen the inside of such a place as a purely organic grocery store, was spotted making her way down the soy cereal aisle. She was first noticed by her appearance- dirt on her vehicle (there are no dirty vehicles in Orlando), a Vera Bradley purse (also a rarity in large cities), and a look of absolute disgust on her face as she saw the prices that people inside the store were paying for "feel-good" crap, er, food. She spent quite a bit of time trying to locate the milk. This was probably because she was looking for a large cooler filled with plastic gallon jugs of milk that came from dairies within 70 miles. When in actuality, she should have been looking for a very small black cooler filled with very small cardboard containers of over priced orgainc milk that had traveled at least 200 miles to get to the store. It was at this cooler that she really began to draw a crowd of onlookers. The shoppers who are usuals at Whole Foods(mostly upper middle class, highly educated, well dressed biased folk who have had NO contact with agriculture in their entire life but have recently taken an extreme interest in blotting out conventional farmers) had never seen a bumpkin before. Some of them had heard tale of such creatures, but most people never considered that such a type of person existed outside the city limits of Orlando. So a small crowd of people began to follow the bumpkin around the store and gawk in amazement as she made her way down the chip aisle. "Who the heck pays $3.99 for a 9oz bag of tortilla chips?", the bumpkin exclaimed. "Um, we do!", replied the crowd. The bumpkin started laughing. The crowd looked at each other puzzled. When the young bumpkin made her way to the check out line, the crowd realized that no one on earth would believe them if they told them this story... country bumpkins are so rare, so unique, so mind blowing.... they scrambled for their iphones so they could take a picture of her and send it out to the masses, but she ran so fast from the store,jumped into a gas guzzling Suburban with a FL Ag tag "FarmGal" and peeled out of the parking lot before they could document it for prosterity. So if you are willing to believe this tale, pass this on to your friends. Is it a myth? Could it be true? ARE BUMPKINS REAL???
(PS- just in case you are confused, I went into a whole foods store for the first time and just had to laugh at myself for being in there)